What is the best way to make my husband jealous while we are apart?
I think it’s fairly fair to say that separated wives trying to save their marriage are often willing to do almost anything to make it happen. It’s a cliché that “all’s fair in love and war,” but when you’re facing a divorce, you’re generally not willing to make any distinctions. And, one way that wives try to level the playing field or give themselves a slight advantage is to try to make their husband jealous.
I recently heard from a wife, who said in part, “My husband left me six weeks ago. He lives with his old college roommate. Although he hasn’t tried to go through with the divorce, he also hasn’t tried to spend a lot of time with me reconnecting.” or save our marriage. He’s polite enough when we talk or meet but he never goes beyond tasteless pleasantries and this is getting so frustrating for me. I started to think maybe I should try to make him jealous. I’m a good friend from a guy at work and this has always driven my husband crazy I thought maybe if my husband thought I had started dating this guy as more than just friends that might make him jealous and be the nudge he needs to to be interested in me again.
The jealousy strategy is very complicated because although I have seen it work very well, I have also seen it backfire. I think it can work if you do it correctly and very sparingly, which I’ll talk about later.
Things to avoid when trying to make your husband jealous while you are apart: I have had wives confess to me that they have actually made up a fictitious boyfriend or suitor in an attempt to make their husband jealous. In other words, the wife has invented a non-existent but perfect guy whose sole purpose in life is to get some reaction from her husband.
This usually backfires because it’s unrealistic to think that you can sustain this for any length of time. And if her husband even suspects that what she’s saying isn’t true, her integrity and her perceived attractiveness are likely to plummet rather quickly, especially in the eyes of her husband.
Therefore, you never want to make outrageous claims that are outright lies, and you never want to appear desperate or overly eager to tell your husband all the juicy details. If it’s apparent that she can’t wait to tell you the beans about the new man in her life, alarm bells will probably go off in her husband’s head. And when she does, he may be very disappointed to hear you say that she expects you and your new man to be very happy together. It is for this reason that she wants to be sparing (rather than generous) with the details.
Someone else’s illusion is much better than someone else’s reality: Most of the time, when I see the jealousy strategy work, it works when the wife is able to make the husband think there might be someone else because of what she doesn’t say instead of what she does say. In order for this to play out as smoothly as possible, your husband should be the one to address if you are seeing someone else. If you announce it yourself, then the impact is lost.
If you’re not sure how to do it, or if you doubt your husband cares, it’s best to start acting “as if” you’re happier. Make sure you are well dressed and have a smile when you interact. At some point, I might ask you what excites you so much and what has changed. It can be very tempting to tell him that someone special has caused the change, but that would be your despair.
Instead, smile and say something like, “I’ve decided to look on the bright side of things and live my life. Even though things between us aren’t going as well as I’d like, there are other aspects of my life.” they’re working out better, so I’m feeling pretty optimistic.” Now, at this point, your husband could ask you directly if there’s anyone else. Trust me when I say that you better tell him that you’re dating all kinds of friends, men, and women. women. You don’t want to make romantic statements or brag. You want to stick to the story that you’re just hanging out with a bunch of friends. But you want to keep the mysterious smile and leave him wondering. His own mind will often do a good job of painting the desired image.
The beauty of this plan is that when you get back together, you really don’t have to explain yourself and there are no real elephants in the room. In the scenario above, if this wife’s husband returned, there would probably be resentment towards her male co-worker. And there would potentially be a problem with her continuing to work with him. However, if she only allowed her husband to draw her own conclusions without making any claims, later on, she would have nothing to defend. She would go on to say that she was just trying to make the best of things while she hung out with friends who offered her some support and relief, even though there was no romance involved. The idea is that the real romance is in your husband’s head (although he doesn’t need to know it at the time) so you don’t have anything to regret later.
