Why should you write when tomorrow
Writing is a form of self-expression that can be an important factor in how you deal with the death of your loved one. This can be especially important as a complement to having a small support system or if you live alone. It can also be a special ability that you have that gives you extra satisfaction in expressing yourself.
On the other hand, anyone can write. You don’t have to be a good writer or speller to use writing as a powerful coping tool. You also don’t have to write a lot every time you sit down with pen in hand. Simply write what you feel at that moment is the basic rule.
So why is it important for you to consider writing as a coping technique? Think about the following.
1. Constant writing leads to healing. It helps you gain and understand new knowledge and ideas that often arise when you are alone and in a contemplative mode. It can jog your memory. You may discover a hint of anger, hidden resentment, or even clear up some of your guilty feelings.
2. Writing a letter to the deceased loved one can be a great way to finish unfinished business. Many people have written about their grief for not being with their loved one at the time of death or for things that were said in a hurry. Others write to tell of their love and concern.
3. Write to the person who has been most faithful and understanding of your needs. It can also be therapeutic to tell your best friend or family member in writing how much you appreciate everything they’ve done and that you love them. Be sure to give specific illustrations of how your support was comforting.
4. Write a letter to God. Ask for help in trying to make sense of your loved one’s death, which is an important task in dealing with their grievance. You may want to ask for a sign that your loved one is okay or for the courage and strength to adjust to life without the loved one’s physical presence.
5. Consider a journal. You may want to consider starting a journal where you record and reflect on your day, and the most difficult and helpful things that happened. Daily writing can be especially helpful when you look back and realize how far you’ve come in your efforts to adjust.
6. Make a list of inspiring and loving statements you can remember your loved one saying. As you review your life and your relationship with your loved one, writing down key phrases or ideas that were discussed can give you a lot of information to reflect on how you would like to keep their memory alive in your life.
7. Write to clarify your objectives. You can also write down how you will deal with certain problems associated with reinvesting in life. Developing a plan for dealing with your new life (the concept of a new life is important to embrace) can give you the necessary direction and a sense of accomplishment. It can be especially helpful to make a “to do” list at the end of each day as a guide for the next day. This structure is also helpful in limiting the time spent focusing only on your loss.
It is essential to understand that the more attention you give to your loss, the more power you give it to dominate life. Since the grievance process is a series of choices, at some point in your grief it becomes essential to decide whether you will be continually loss or restoration oriented. Loving in separation and reinvesting in life are not mutually exclusive. Together they are part of moving forward.
Through trial and error decide when it is convenient for you to write. Some like to do it in the morning, others before retiring for the day. By using writing as an outlet for your thoughts and feelings, it will also help you physically because every thought and emotion affects you on a cellular level as well. You will never forget your beloved, and the writing will ensure that it is so.
